Monster jokes
Jokes
Country of origin: Various/unknown
More jokes here
- What kind of dog does Dracula have?
A Bloodhound!
- Where did they put Dracula when he was arrested?
In a red bloodcell!
- What is Dracula's favorite holiday?
Fangsgiving!
- What do you give a vampire with a cold?
Coffin Drops!
- Why did the vampire quit the baseball team?
They would only let him be BAT boy!
- Why didn't Dracula get married?
He never met a nice Ghoul!
- What do you call a motor bike belonging to a witch?
A broooooooom stick!
- Was Dracula ever married?
No, he was a bat-chelor!
- Why are skeletons usually so calm?
Nothing gets under their skin!
- What do vampires gamble with?
Stake money!
- What sort of group do vampires join?
A blood group!
- Why do skeletons hate winter?
Beacuse the cold goes right through them!
- What do you call an old and foolish vampire?
A silly old sucker!
- Who is a vampire likely to fall in love with?
The girl necks door!
- What is red, sweet and bites people?
A jampire!
- What story do little witches like to hear at bedtime?
Ghoul deluxe and the three scares!
- Why do dragons sleep during the day?
So they can fight knights!
- What do you get when you divide the circumference of your jack-o lantern by its diameter?
Pumpkin Pi!
- What should you say when you meet a ghost?
How do you boo, sir how do you boo!
- Mummy, mummy all the kids call me a werewolf!
Never mind dear, now just go and comb your face!
- Why do demons hang out with ghouls?
Because demons are a ghouls best friend!
- What did the mother ghost say to the baby ghost?
Put your boos and shocks on!
- How do you make a milkshake?
Sneak up behind a glass of milk and yell Boo"!
- What would you find on a haunted beach?
A sand witch!
- When do ghosts usually appear?
Just before someone screams!
- What do you think of Dracula films?
Fangtastic!
- Who brings the monsters their babies?
Frankenstork!
- Why are ghosts cowards?
Because they've got no guts!
- What do Indian ghosts sleep in?
A creepy teepee!
- Did you hear about the ghouls favourite hotel?
It had running rot and mould!
- What do you get if you cross Dracula with Al Capone?
A fangster!